I have been single and unemployed for almost the same amount of time. I don’t count my 8 month rebound as a change to my single status. We will sweep him under the rug along with my lapse in judgment. Yes, I know that rebounds aren’t supposed to last that long but I was traveling a lot and lost track of time. Maybe I need a rebound from my rebound. Is that a thing? But I digress. Back to why dating and job hunting are similar if not the same.
1) Dating is like an interview loop. You can have two really good dates/interviews and then something can derail you on the third one and it is almost impossible to get your groove back. Whether it is an interviewer that you don’t click with or a date who forgets he asked you out…
2) You spend ages getting ready – picking the right outfit, putting on make-up, brushing your hair, prepping with the right questions – trying to make the best impression you can. Sometimes it is worth it and a lot of times it isn’t.
3) At a certain point it is a numbers game. Eventually something is going to stick, right? The right recruiter will reach out. You will meet an interesting guy. They can’t all be duds, can they?
4) You are interviewing them as much as they are interviewing you. Things can look good on paper but suck in real life. Yes, he has a job and seems stable but in reality he has the attention span of a gnat and you wonder how he remembers what day of the week it is. Oh yeah, the job seems really promising and the team is great if you don’t look at the fact that the attrition is out of control and no one likes the manager…
5) They think you’re overqualified for the role. For jobs it is a worry that I will get bored, that I am too strategic, not tactical enough or too expensive. For dating, I am too intimidating, too independent, too self-reliant. Essentially I am too me. I can’t help that I am a successful and neurotic cat lady. If you can’t hang, that is on you, not me. Put on your big boy pants and catch up.
If only jobs and men could be put in a Pilot Program or a temp to hire situation. Perhaps a three month probationary period? Don’t they do that in Europe? Maybe I need to move. I could be a femme des chats instead.