Allergic to Exercise

Kermit exercise

My dad says that my mom is allergic to exercise. I think it must be hereditary. I hate it. With a passion. Every minute of it. Even yoga. My friends don’t believe me because I am pretty active. I have played volleyball, tennis, roller derby and now am working on learning to climb and honing my yoga skills. They don’t understand that every cell in my body is rebelling until I am in shavasana – corpse pose. Lying on the floor acting dead is perfect for me. However, there are a few things that I can appreciate about exercise,

1) Leggings. I am on board with this idea of athleisure wear. Don’t be confused though, leggings aren’t pants. Leggings should be worn with a shirt that covers or skims the butt area. I know this is a very controversial statement but I stand by it.

2) The cute yoga instructor at my Monday class. He said his arm-span is 6’2″. I bet he gives great hugs. How does one flirt in a yoga class? I feel like yoga is such an awkward endeavor at the best of times without trying to look sexy for the guy showing me how to do Downward Dog correctly.

3) The climbing gym. Such great people watching. I don’t know if I have ever seen so many hipsters in one place. Someone told me it would be a good place to meet men. The jury is still out on that one for me. In the meantime, I am delaying the probability of bingo wings with hefting my body weight up a wall.

4) Sports bras. My default undergarment for every occasion. Why wear a regular bra when you can be comfortable? They are also cheap. Old Navy sports bras are only $10 on sale. Granted I don’t have huge boobs so this may not be an option for everyone. I apologize if I am minimizing your struggle or my own for that matter…

One thought on “Allergic to Exercise

  1. Anthony says:

    Love. There are exercise categories that connect you to the earth. “Grounding”, “Feldenkrais”, “Happy Body”… may serve you.
    Plus you can wear a sports bra; just sayin’.

    Like

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